An Exercise in Self-Defense

An Exercise in Self-Defense

An Exercise in Self-Defense is a poem by Hopewell Valley Central High School junior Edison Hicks & was published in Panorama, the literary arts magazine.

An Exercise in Self-Defense

Maybe this writing is flawed in execution
While the concept is an entirely different matter
For reasons obvious and unstated

I wish to make my own narrative
So maybe I’m not being the most truthful
Twisting scenarios to gain sympathy
Just to rationalize what I feel

And maybe this anger is clouding my judgment
Maybe he’s changed for the better, but I’d rather not know
Because I don’t want to invalidate myself
And maybe I’m just defending my pride
Against a barrage of arguments I made on my own
So I guess it’s my turn on the defendant’s stand
To shout a storm and defend my credit
Before anyone can break my barrier

I am my own attorney, prosecutor, witness, defendant,
Judge, jury, and executioner
But the guillotine is too dull
The veins in my arm are invisible
So my punishment will be delayed and no one can advance it
I lay here with the knowledge of my verdict and nothing else
Nothing to push me along
Stuck on the floor of a recurring memory
That I can’t seem to leave behind
Why can’t I forget my past
When I know it will only hurt me?

By Edison Hicks 11th Grader at HVCHS

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